THE GUILT GLUE
The jumbled mess, of heart-wrenching words, floods your mind. You fell into the trap, the never ending game, that your mind devotedly plays. There seems to be no beginning or end, a cyclical loop, tossing you around.
You’re frozen – anguish and animosity invading space. Forward motion seems quite literally impossible. The guilt glue.
Guilt comes in storms. There can be clouds of hopelessness hanging over your head, or the storms creep up in the afternoon or evening. Perhaps, it’s a downpour of all the shame in the morning. However, we can navigate the storm, we don’t have to fall victim to external circumstances. We don’t have to believe the lies that Guilt tries to convince us of.
The burden, weight, embarrassment, and shame we carry is a choice. Trust me, writing that seems so foreign and wrong. Yet, I've spent 95% of my life with these feelings at the center, and it has brought me nowhere beyond the past. It is time to try something new and let go of what is not serving me: Guilt + Shame.
Where in your life does the Guilt arise? Does Guilt hold you back from taking the next step?
What lights this fire of remorse? Could it be with the way you treat yourself, the “mistakes” you’ve made, the actions you didn’t or did take? Could it be with the friendship or relationship you are in? Could you feel a heaping amount of guilt keeping you from reaching out for help, or turning to and leaning on God?
The chains of guilt from lost treasure can harness us down, holding us captive in a dark cave. We can no longer be attached to the past, for what has happened has been done, and grace is what moves us forward.
It can be difficult to understand that our shame is a choice. I am not saying that we choose our pain; however, we do choose our response. It is pivotal to lean into our deep feelings, yet it is just as important to not reside in the darkness. With the focus on the road ahead, we can place overbearing expectations on our future. With change, we tend to want to go from one end to the other as quickly as possible, without having to feel the discomfort. You don’t need to accomplish everything all at once. That pressure is paralyzing.
Instead let’s redirect ourselves into understanding that purposeful, small steps will lead to a greater future. Making tangible strides that align with what you know you can do at this time, leads you toward fulfillment; rather than stretching yourself thin, and feeling disappointed.
The first step begins with grace. Grace is the catapult for transformation. You cannot hate your way into change. Acknowledging your past effort and trusting your ability gives you power to keep trekking onward.
Grace gives you space; space to be. A capacity to listen to your heart and be open to the rawness of life. Grace has no limits.
Grace begins with forgiveness, honoring your continuous fight, and accepting where you are at. Grace thrives when comparison is released and replaced with gratitude. It is understanding and holding tightly to the real you; it is knowing that your worth is beyond your accomplishments, titles, and mistakes.
Do not let regret keep you pinned down, dwelling in the “what-if’s”. Often we get so defeated by the growing list of to-do’s, the dreams, and desires. However, you cannot swallow it whole. The small steps lead you to the greatest outcomes. Enjoy the journey. Do the things that scare you, share your deepest feelings, be vulnerable. Life is worth authentically living.
xx,
j